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Letter from Emily
Hi
My name is Emily Dayton, in February of 2012, when I was a student at Cabrini College my parents and I founded You Can NOT Be Replaced®. I am now a Junior at The University of Dallas where I am playing soccer and majoring in Fine Art. My story begins in 2008 when I was a freshman in high school. I was a student at Manasquan High School in New Jersey and between April of my freshman year to the end of my senior year there were 6 suicides. Those losses were a part of the largest suicide cluster in the country with 12 deaths of young people in southern monmouth county ages 14-21ys in a 4 year time frame. Experiencing those tragedies definitely made a huge impact on me and taught me a valuable lesson on the importance of life.
February 2012 there was another tragic loss. At this point I was a freshman at Cabrini. I was so upset I came home for the weekend. I sat at my kitchen table with them talking about the loss and said to them 'Dont they realize they can't be replaced!'. This is when my parents and I took the opportunity to create a change. We first ordered 500 wristbands for our local teens, but quickly we had to reorder and began getting donations. Through a lot of skyping designs and phone calls we put up this site, facebook, twitter and grew from there.
Our focus at YCNBR is on encouraging the growth and strength of youth and families by promoting the irreplaceable value of each individual. Each person has gifts that are unique and no one can be you. The life you have is not just a gift for you but for others. We also feel that our goal is to be five years ahead of someone who could be considering ending their life or just struggling with life choices. We feel that knowing your purpose in life gives you more reason to make more positive decisions.
After reading the information on our website, I hope that you take a moment to remember how valuable you are. I hope you become interested in helping others to value life by being kind or even by helping to promote You Can NOT Be Replaced.
You never know what a simple act of kindness will do to make a difference; holding the door, saying thank you, sitting with someone who is alone, or even making eye contact while giving a simple smile. You don’t know what they’re feeling inside or what their story is, so smile and pass the bands; you will change someone’s day.
If you would like to become a part of You Can NOT Be Replaced® , you can email me and I would love to talk to you about what you can do to help! Be that someone that will change someone else’s day around.
“No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted.” –Aesop
Love Emily
PS: If you find that you are in a place of real sadness that you just cant shake, or if you know deep in your heart that you need help please go to our link page and find my friend Lisa Schenke’s website.
Lisa lost her oldest son Tim in April of 2008. This was and still is the hardest loss for me even though I didn’t even know Tim. Lisa through her grief has become a strong advocate and source for those who struggle. She has links to websites and hotlines that could help you.
Please always remember you are loved, you are valuable and that there is always hope.
Hi Parents,
We are glad you've found us. You Can NOT Be Replaced® began with a heart to heart conversation we had with our oldest kids after the tragic death of a teen in our area. He was the 7th from our High School, the 12th from our area over a four year time span. For the last 4 years we have had similar conversations with our kids over and over. Each story was very different and there will always be questions no one can answer.
The more we talked we agreed that we've noticed a lot of young people (not just the ones the community lost) have a hard time when life gets difficult to navigate. They look in the wrong places for comfort. Its that searching heart that tries to fill the 'hole' with 'things', alcohol and or drugs. When things get complicated Its easy to forget how valuable you are.
What could we do? There are already good counseling services in our area, and our school does a tirelessly good job with kids in crisis. Where do we fit in serving the area? With small subtle shifts focusing attention to the core of the person. The place that wants to be loved, valued and appreciated deep inside. Sometimes the answer to something complicated is simplicity. We came up collectively with our slogan, passing the wrist bands and focusing on doing kind acts for others. We didnt really mean to start what we did, but within a week we had a donation to order more wristbands, another week and another donation...finally we became official.
Very quickly our family idea has grown into something we didn't expect, we have wrist bands going out weekly to schools, college students, families and towns all over the country. Our Facebook page has been seen by thousands. In a years time we have over 18,000 wristbands across the country (1/25/2014). Its very humbling, but also very exciting.
The act of passing a wristband is simple. Passing one gives an excuse or prop to approach another person. Approaching someone with genuine concern or appreciation takes the focus off of ourselves. Being a part of touching another at their core is a special thing, it changes their day and is a great feeling for both people involved. Passing 'I can NOT be replaced' wrist bands is addictive.
Our school assemblies have been amazing. We started last January and have a full fall on the books already. Its a wonderful experience to have a teen run to the stage after we're done to chat, share or cry with us. What a great gift to be able to reach them, we are blessed.
We think the best way we serve the teens and young adults is for the adults in their lives to be their best. What we mirror to the young people in our lives is more important than what we say. They can smell a faker a mile away. We also think that for transformations to take place, all you need is that small change. Many subtle shifts together can make a significant difference.
Each of us is unique; we have gifts and talents that are exclusive to ourselves. It’s in our nature as humans to live in community and share our gifts. It’s that simple. We become an even better community when we work together.
Join us!
Melissa and Chip
36,000 of our passable wristbands are traveling across
the USA, Canada, UK and Australia
and counting....
"No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted" Aesop
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